Make people better ?The only thing you could do, is bringing chance of change to others, then they will find decision by themselves
When I was young, I thought that I was a “superwoman”, thought of that I am able to effect and change some ones. Time goes by, stepping through the dust, I suddenly realized that I was totally wrong. Those staffs I love, be obligated to learn these things, do those things, changing anything to be better. Be forced to do unwillingly, afraid of her sadness to do, but finally everything re-turns to the beginning
In this life, no one can change others. You seem to be paranoid of thinking that you could change anyone. Only they can change themselves. Therefore, Do not waste time for trying. The only thing you could do, is to give opportunity of change to others, then they will make their own decision.
This life, No one can make decision for others, and there is no Buddha who naturally appears to change Ms Tam’s life. Do not dream like that! Everything which changes in our life is upon us. We don’t want and don’t work hard to change ourselves, so a thousand of good teachers and plentiful of experts, also can not make anything.
Someone asked me, Could I teach them to keep fire to continue changing, cause her heroic decision to complete, then the next day it would “flat” as bubble deflated. Sounds like some bubble pumping courses, taking advantage of crowd psychology to make the climax for earning money. Then go home, lose context, flat out than when you had not come to school.
When we do not have enough motivation, because the purpose of action is not strong enough, because the value of leverage is not big enough, then carrying the bicycle pump along to the pump it yourself. It is not drug to find doping whenever flatting.
Question for yourself: What is your last purpose? I always tell my staffs that: It is not important what you do, it should be asked that why we are doing what we are doing? Do it contribute to our toward journey? If not, get rid of it. Fear those who always complain of too much work. To re-check, sometimes up to 80% is to do something not important
So, do not try to change others. Do not wait to someone who can change yourself. Waste unworthy time. To change or not, change is the determination and individual journey of each person.
Do not blame. Do not paranoid. The first step is always to return to face ourselves.
“You can’t change people. Only they can change themselves.”